Build Date: Fri Mar 28 16:50:31 2025 UTC
THE INTERNET IS A CURSE!!!!!!!!! wrought down upon my head like a plague of locusts.
-- The Compulsive Splicer
Scary Technology
Everything you ever wanted to know about Scary Technology.
Pigdog Journal Articles
2004-12-30
Ok, so this isn't the really the Johnnie Royale game, in fact, the author of this little Flash page not only doesn't know who in the hell I am, but happens to live somewhere in Eastern Europe, not that there is anything wrong with Eastern Europe, just that it's a long way away and I've never been. And since I'm jumping off this rather pathetic article with disclaimers, I might as well mention that our own esteemed Frank Jones was the PDJer that discovered this applet and laughingly named it after me.
2002-04-18
Tell ya whut, you've all gotta get GOLF BAG LIGHTERS. Ninety-nine cents at the 99 Cent Store. GOLF BAG LIGHTER.
2001-12-01
So, your computer is sitting there, idle, doing nothing but wasting power. What if you could take those spare CPU cycles and do something useful with them? Rather than crack codes or search for extraterrestrial life, you could join thousands of others and help track down the elusive Yeti using this special software...
2001-07-18
Yesterday the U.S. busted a Russian programmer Dmitry Sklyarov for breaking the infamous DMCA act. It is not really clear to me if Dmitry was jailed (and he is currently sitting in a Las Vegas jail) for writing a piece of code that defeats Adobe's PDF file encryption schema or for talking about it at the notorious hacker convention, Defcon, held this year in Las Vegas.
2000-08-07
"When an attack is identified, ManHunt images/begins automatically determining the source of the attack and shares attack information securely with other networks involved in the attack, such as an upstream network service provider, to track the source of the attack across a distributed network. ManHunt can also automatically divert the attack to a decoy environment, such as ManTrap for forensic data gathering." -- Marketing blurb from Recourse Technologies web site
2000-05-10
I love the web. Do you know why? No, it's not just because of the plentiful, easy-to-locate pornography and baseball scores. It's also because of stuff like this: pages with no other real purpose than to give you lists of universal remote codes.
1999-11-29
It's true!! It's true!! The Germans are Bad People, almost as rotten as the British! The proof is in the SCIENCE! German "scientists" have discovered a way to genetically attach glowing jellyfish goo to bug DNA, creating FRANKENBUGS!! Bugs with GLOWING GREEN EYES!!
1999-11-08
These days, we don't have torch-wielding mobs storm the laboratory. We just let our government make a ruling, subtly hinting that failing to comply will result in the same angry mob. By "we", of course, I mean "Japan". So when this scientist, Setsuo Iwasaki, wants to do an experiment on cell division to research leukemia. But the government says, "Holy shit! This vaguely resembles human cloning!"
1999-09-22
Let him who has understanding reckon the number of the beast, for it is a human number, its number is 5,878,155.
1999-07-22
Computer Underground Digest! Is still! Being published! Weekly! Mother fuck!
1999-07-22
Man, remember the days when you could get your computer confiscated just for having a Phrack on your hard drive? Or so they said. God, those seem like simpler times.
1999-07-15
Steve Jobs will show off a new CRAZY LOOKING laptop at the MacWorld convention in New York next week, aimed at students, home users, and cheapskates. The new portable has a massively reengineered architecture and a wacky new case.
1999-06-30
Some doctors carry medicine and stethoscopes in their little black bags. When an unnamed doctor from U.C. Berkeley came to visit San Francisco last week, he decided to bring a vial of tuberculosis bacilli instead. Whatever he intended to do with the deadly bacteria will have to wait until he can whip up a fresh batch, because someone stole the vial.
1999-03-11
Imagine humping 25 miles a day and then having to violently fling yourself into an enemy foxhole or tunnel, wildly stabbing everyone you encounter with your steely bayonet. Imagine doing that every single day for a week--without showering, without changing your clothes. Imagine that you are Canadian, and you have huge tits!
Offsite links shared by staff writers
2004-06-30
2001-04-15
2000-11-16
2000-10-08
1999-11-08
Wonder if it's wash and wear or dry clean only...
1999-09-22
1999-08-04
1999-08-02
'Curse Free TV' is a gadget that scans closed-captioning in order to mute-out profanity and 'other offensive phrases.'
1999-07-07
1999-07-07
Evil ad-installer hidden in BIOS
1999-06-03
1999-06-02
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Paranoid Strippers & Psychotic Crack Dealers (Tales of Christmas Eve)
Christmas day, for the last 17 or so years has bored me. I find that the real fun and excitement always takes place on Christmas Eve. Every other year, it's the excitement of the metaphorical hunt instead of the kill. Otherwise, it's just plain bad craziness. (More...)
Three Days and 25 Spocktails: A Cautionary Tale
Johnnie Royale picked me up from the dental surgery. I felt warm, safe, cradled in the anathesia's loving embrace. The pharmacy downstairs gave me a bottle of Vicodin and a few instructions: take it with food, don't mix with alcohol, don't operate heavy machinery. I put it in my pocket and we left. "Do you want to go home, or do you want to go to a bar?" asked Johnnie. (More...)
The Innocent San Francisco Mule
Flesh and Abby have moved to an isolated rural location in the United States - equipped only with their sense of adventure. Recently they came down off the mountain briefly to file this report? (More...)
This week: another fine spocktail from the beverage researchers at SMRL! Drink it in peace, because WE DID THE RESEARCH! (More...)
Report from Spiritual Machines
Arkuat gives you the inside scoop on the "Spiritual Machines" panel and conclave. Wacky excitement ensues! (More...)
High Availability Guinness Stress Test
All too often we forget the incredible depth of technology behind the weekly ritual of TNiPN@*. We tend to only become aware of the strategy of High Available Guinness (HAG) when it rises to the forefront during a complete and utter venue failure. Yet we should all be super grateful that this system exists. (More...)
