Build Date: Wed Nov 19 13:20:30 2025 UTC
It's the fucking Web. Don't expect documentation.
-- Mr. Bad
Brain-Dead Judge Watch
...because the law is not always on your side.
Pigdog Journal Articles
2003-01-22
Back in July, the Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA) subpoenaed Verizon Internet Services, Inc. to submit the name of an Internet user who, in one day, downloaded more than 600 songs. On Tuesday, January 21, Judge John D. Bates of the U.S. District Court for the District of Columbia ordered Verizon to comply with the RIAA subpoena. Cary Sherman of the RIAA says the industry group looks forward to contacting the Verizon subscriber, "so we can let them know that what they are doing is illegal."
2002-04-19
Wait, isn't that out of order?
2002-02-05
Amidst the recent dramas of killing friendly Afghans, letting corporate bastardos shred evidence, and watching politicos forget they got bought, a little bomblet snuck under the radar and almost made me drop my drink.
2000-11-07
Finally, a verdict that makes sense. The 9th Circuit Court ruled today that a prosecutor can't tell a jury that god wants the defendant dead in a death penalty case.
2000-10-28
I sometimes wonder why they even bother with trials in Texas in death penalty cases. They should just shoot the defendant and save all the time and money spent on a trial.
2000-04-04
April 3, 2000 will go down in history as the darkest day EVER for free-market ethics and values. The Department of Justice has wrapped its clammy claws around the throat of American business, strangling it to DEATH! Hang your head in SHAME, Americans, because we have let the secret One World Government strip away our FREEDOM to INNOVATE!
2000-04-03
A man in Texas received a 16 year prison sentence for stealing a Snickers candy bar. On previous occasions he had stolen a bag of Oreos and a tool box.
2000-03-27
Hey, sports fan! Have you just received a jury summons because you made the mistake of registering to vote in the 2000 primaries? And now you're all bummed and trying to make up an imaginary ill relative so you can squirm out of this odious task? Well, kwitcher squirmin', Worm Boy! This is your chance to MAKE SOME LAWS.
2000-02-04
A Maryland judge is being investigated for possible violation of the state's code of judicial conduct after telling an 11-year-old sexual assault victim that "it takes two to tango." Uh, somebody rent Lolita a few to many times?
1999-01-09
Microsoft's anti-trust trial found experts warning the judge of "A Microsoft World." Duh! El Destino spells it out for the judge with the inevitable Disneyland song parody
Offsite links shared by staff writers
1999-08-06
1999-06-10
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
An innocent trip to the Central Market resulted in a severe attack of arachnophobia (and a meal) when a depraved street kid set her vicious pet spider on an unsuspecting shopper. (More...)
On the Implementation of a Grocery Bag And Overforestation Initiative
Patient Joab and his evil cohort, Patient Steve, develop a proposal for the plastic-v.-paper problem that EVERYONE can be happy with. An EXCLUSIVE from Spock Mountain Research Labs! (More...)
Patient Joab's scientifick editorial discusses aspect of the space-time-beer continuum never before processed by sub-bush-robot minds!!! Too fabulantastic to contempulate! (More...)
A Treatise Prepared for the Gallup Organization on the Symbolism of the Scarab
Well dahlings, the response to my new tarot column has been quite overwhelming. I got three whole pieces of mail requesting my arcane insight. One asked why blogs suck so much, and one was a completely incomprehensible tale of bears shitting random numbers in the woods — I am fairly certain it was a cryptographic allegory. Howsomever, only ONE of the inquiries was accompanied by a crisp ten-dollar bill, and so it's the Gallup Organization that will this week reap the benefit of my wicked pack of cards. (More...)
A Day in the Life of a Beverotologist
It was starting to look like a very boring Saturday, trapped as I was in the suburban wastelands of the outer Bay Area, so I called my Able Assistant (AA) and proposed that we perform some Spocktail field tests. For some time I've been working on creating the quintessential cinematic beverage and even tho' SMRL does most of its testing during nocturnal hours, this seemed an opportune time to roll up the sleeves of our labcoats and get some science done. While the beverotology creation tested this day (The Neurotoxin) must be deemed a success, this article focuses more the journey of the experimenters, rather then the science of beverotology. (More...)
Brother Wayne Lays Down the Truth
Flesh interviews Wayne Kramer of MC5. (More...)
