Build Date: Fri Mar 28 22:40:12 2025 UTC
Ordinarily, I'd be happy to piss on you, but then some dog might think I owned you.
-- Reverend Cybersatan
Pigdog Disco Jackets of the Future!!
1999-07-12 05:22:58
Spock Mountain Research Labs' crack team of hillbilly scientists was given a very special assignment to "test-drive" a crazy new technology that only we could handle. Each volunteer was issued a lab coat OF THE FUTURE and sent out to party like it was 1999!
Xerox PARC thinks they are so fancy shmancy with their fancy new Digital Paper, but can you wear it?? Does it glow in the dark? Is it good for late night rock till you drop dance parties??! Of course not.
But, thanks to the good people at Cambridge Display Technology this will ALL BE POSSIBLE!! They have developed the Plastic of the Future for the Bad People of the Future!!! Fabulous!!
Soon they will be able to make all kinds of cool shit, cheap. Video phones, roll-up computer screens, blah, blah, and most importantly, CLOTHES. My favorite clothing idea is the special camouflage wear. You could put your special "I don't want to deal with people" jumpsuit on, hook up your battery pack and sit back while your suit generates an image of your surroundings perfectly blending you into the background.
Okay, maybe that wont work, but just think of the fashion choices!
And, just in case you thought it couldn't get any crazier, the inventors were able to start their company with the backing of the rock band GENESIS!
The best part of all this is that Hillbilly Scientists were sent out for all-night RAVE CRAZINESS!! (As you can see in the groovy picture!!!)
T O P S T O R I E S
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C L A S S I C P I G D O G
The IBM Selectric Typewriter Changed My Life
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Clowns Take on God in Mysterious Annual Ceremony
Last Sunday's (the 6th) Grimaldi Service at a small church in East London was a red-letter day for clowns worldwide. About a hundred old-school red-nosed clowns made the sombre trip to darkest Dalston to pay their respects to clowns who died in the last year and to thank God for the gift of laughter in a bizarre ceremony presided over by the eccentric Reverend Clown Roly, resplendent in a garish red lumberjack shirt with oversized gold lapels. (More...)
Grow better illegal mushrooms than lousy "Psilocybe fanaticus"
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Johnny Royale loves his Trackman ultra pointer thingy. It's coolio! Read all about it! (More...)
The quest for knowledge never ends at the super top secret Spock Mountain Laboratory, although it is frequently interrupted by beverage breaks. Recently, a team of crack ethnomixologists returned from a dangerous expedition to the frozen expanse of Canada with the much sought recipe for a Spocktail that is destined to replace blunt force head trauma as the major cause of brain damage in the civilized world. (More...)
"Gee, I wish I was older."
"So do I." (More...)
