Build Date: Sat Feb 22 05:40:18 2025 UTC
I guess that leaves killing Hare Krishnas as the only vice I've got left. Funny, because no one's been on me to kick that habit.
-- Bill Hicks
Beyond DVD
2000-03-06 22:58:09
You've just installed a DVD burner and you think you're cutting edge? You think a 17GB disc is a lot of room? HA! FMD-ROMs are on the horizon, cramming 140GB onto a disc the size of a CD-ROM.
140GB is enough storage for 20 hours of porno movies!
Or 300,000 scat GIFs!
You could store more than half a million USENET messages telling you how to Make Money Fast!
This disk is so big, you could fit EVERY SINGLE VERSION OF THE NEIMAN MARCUS / MRS. FIELDS COOKIE RECIPE CURRENTLY ON THE INTERNET PLUS each and EVERY version of the introductory story about how the author got ripped off, AND you could include a copy for every rip-off amount from $2.50 all the way up through $2,501.52!
What are you waiting for? Get yours while supplies last!
... and if you want to get rid of that useless old DVD-burner, you can always mail it to Baron Earl, c/o Pigdog, and I'll be sure to find it a good home.
Thanks to Sam Uzi for the URL.
T O P S T O R I E S
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
The Once & Future King of Dust
Only The Onion could have acquired Infowarts. (More...)
Another Nobel Prize-Winning Author Describes Drunkenness
This book won a Pulitzer Prize. Here's its famous paragraph on getting drunk... (More...)
Why I'm pretty sure JD Vance had sex with a couch
True or false? The answers await us in that magical land where all truths are revealed -- the internet. (More...)
In 2010 Dr. Cheng-Huai Ruan discovered a way to cause a patient with an abnormal heartbeat to get back into a normal rhythm by sticking a finger up the patient's ass. (More...)
WKRP in Cincinnati aired from 1978 through 1982. Howard Hesseman played Dr. Johnny Fever, a DJ from Los Angeles who was fired from his previous job for saying the word "booger" on the air. In the show Hesseman would do some dialogue, introduce a song, and start the song. You'd hear a few notes, but never the whole song. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
About 14 years ago when I was on a road trip and stopped in Seattle, I was invited to a party. At this party there were these little tiny glasses sitting in a flat-bottomed bowl of ice. Thin cylinders about an inch in diameter and 4 inches tall, with thick glass at the bottom. Into these were poured frozen AKVAVIT... also known as the water of life. (More...)
First there was the Bloody Mary: Vodka, Tomato Juice, Worcestershire sauce, some spices, and celery. We drank it, and it was good. Then any drink with tomato juice got a prefix of "bloody" attached to it. We drank them, and they were mostly bad. Now Pigdog gets back to basics and introduces The Bloody Dog, a drink with REAL BLOOD in it. HUMAN BLOOD. (More...)
Patient Joab's scientifick editorial discusses aspect of the space-time-beer continuum never before processed by sub-bush-robot minds!!! Too fabulantastic to contempulate! (More...)
This was an old standby back in my poor college days. Back then the goal was to get butt fucking wasted for as little money as possible. The problem was we hated dirt cheap beer - and some weekends, even Henry's was far more lucre then we could scratch together. So we invented Red. (More...)
Extreme pimpin' under pressure ... how to tell a playa from a sucka ... keeping your hoes under control ... tips for mackin' success from Pigdog's own Terrordrone. (More...)
It was the night of the Leonid meteor showers -- the perfect opportunity to break out the evil opaline liquor, get madder than hatters, and test wireless ethernet hardware... Would the plunging meteorites interfere with the 2.4GHz band? What about our delicate brain waves? (More...)
