Build Date: Thu Jul 2 06:10:15 2026 UTC
I'm gonna use this Model M until it drives all my coworkers INSANE.
-- Mr. Bad
Come on, people. It's SQRAT Pox! Get it right.
2003-06-12 08:58:45
Dear god, people! Can't you see the plain facts? It's SQRATpox I'm telling you! And yes it IS a conspiracy.
Just look at the facts: In the US, "monkeypox" is found in pet rats & prairie dogs. According to the CDC, "The virus that causes monkeypox was recovered from an African ***!!!squirrel!!!***, which may be the natural host." (Added a little emphasis there.) Lab tests indicate that it could also infect rabbits and mice.
This "monkeypox" misnomer is leading us right to where the sqrat menace wants us, lulling us with a label that says "Only them funny monkeys got that pox. My cute widdle Fluffy Bunkins would never give me that pox. Oh, no he wouldn't! No he wouldn't!"
Write to your congressman, the CDC & the WHO. Demand that they act on the bioterrorist threat of SQRATpox before it's too late. Before we're all dripping pus from our eroding flesh and the sqrat operatives make their move to destroy our precious freedom.
T O P S T O R I E S
America's National Recording Registry Inducts Culturally Significant Artist - Weezer!
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Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
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C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Three Days and 25 Spocktails: A Cautionary Tale
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Still Up For the Party? America's Dance Floors Are Graying
Raving over 30 doesn't have to be embarassing anymore. (More...)
Our team of crack journalists went insane, and made the drive from Concord, California to Concord, New Hasmpshire on Interstate 80. Read the insightful observations of our intrepid travelers made on their journey into the heartland. (More...)
The One I Feel Sorry For Is Joses
We've had a lot of Jesus coverage lately here at the PDJ. But let's face it, we're not exactly cutting-edge in this subject area. Jesus has been making headlines for, oh, I guess it's a couple thousand years now. Jesus is a very strong brand. Jesus has a lot of mindshare. (More...)
During a magnificent sunny day in a fast receding autumn, the Spock Science Monitor reporters once again blew the playa dust off of their computers and covered the 2002 Burning Man Decompression – held every year just east of Portola Hill in beautiful San Francisco. Both an afternoon and evening issues were released to the unsuspecting crowd of freaks attempting to in some small way experience the euphoria of the playa – if but for a brief afternoon far from the desolation of Northern Nevada. (More...)
Pigdog dispatched special correspondent Ratsnatcher for a holiday reconnaissance of America's frozen hell. After ten days of silence, our shortwave radio cackled with Ratsnatcher's static-filled transmission. (More...)
