Build Date: Sat Nov 22 04:30:16 2025 UTC
THE INTERNET IS A CURSE!!!!!!!!! wrought down upon my head like a plague of locusts.
-- The Compulsive Splicer
Goatsucker Unemployed in Argentina
2002-08-15 23:37:16
Known throughout Central and South America as the "Chupacabra", they suck the blood from living goats, draining them dry and leaving them dead. Times are hard everywhere, and the downturn in the Argentine economy left one goatsucker with no choice but to apply for unemployment benefits.
Unemployment benefits in Argentina are only about USD$42 per month, but you can buy an awful lot of goat blood for $42. With $42, a family of six goatsuckers can have their thirst for goat blood quenched for an entire month. If they buy day-old goat blood, they can even save enough money to buy new shoes for the littlest goatsuckers.
But Argentine officials aren't about to let the goatsuckers have a free ride. Unemployment benefits are only for citizens, and Argentine officials aren't about to write out checks to illegal aliens.

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