Build Date: Mon Mar 31 10:21:38 2025 UTC
I hate the French! Give back our weirdo hillbilly television, you goddamn Frogs!
-- Tjames Madison
The Catholic Church: Keeping Abreast
2001-12-22 08:53:36
You can't live in—or even visit—San Francisco without seeing a large pyramid-like building in the skyline. Many don't know that it's actually a Catholic cathedral. But even fewer suspect the source of this building's power: RAW FEMALE SEXUALITY.
I'll start with the background: Saint Mary's Cathedral in San Francisco was designed by architect Pier Luigi Nervi in 1971 and built amid an atmosphere of controversy. The building has been described by many as resembling an overgrown washing machine agitator, and several San Franciscans have taken to calling it "Our Lady of Maytag" for this resemblance. Others find the swooping pyramid shape refreshingly modern for sacred Catholic architecture. Yet the majority of visitors and residents still simply wonder what that large white shape is on the San Francisco skyline West of downtown and uphill of the Tenderloin.
http://www.bluffton.edu/~sullivanm/nervi/nervi.html
Urban legend has it that when viewed from the correct angle at the proper time of day when the heavenly bodies are aligned, that one can see the outline of a woman's breast in the shadow cast on the side of the cathedral by one of its 'wings'. Urban legend also has it that the Catholic Church sued the architect over the appearance of the breast, claiming that the appearance of a naked breast on the side of a cathedral somehow mocks the Church, which is reputed for being uptight about sexuality.
Interestingly enough, the first part of this urban legend is in fact true. Although the outline is a caricature of a breast—no real women, even after surgery, have breasts quite so large and defiant of gravity with such a complete lack of a ribcage—the outline is clear, resembling the breast of the chrome woman who reclines on so many truckers' mudflaps. St. Mary's needs be viewed from the Southwest in the midmorning. Alamo Square is a good viewing location, and depending on the season, sometime between 9 and 10 in the morning is the appropriate time.
On the issue of the Catholic Church's lawsuit, extensive research shows no evidence that the church ever filed suit against Nervi or even threatened to. The rumor could have started by the "telephone game" effect after individuals associated with the church or the Archdiocese made private commentary on the shape, but even this is idle speculation.
![]() | ![]() |
![]() | |
Do you see a breast? |
This would make an ironic sort of sense. By preying upon the so-called baser instincts of men, the church could in fact be reaching out to those that supposedly need ministering the most: sinners. The righteous, after all, are already righteous.
Right?
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Three Days and 25 Spocktails: A Cautionary Tale
Johnnie Royale picked me up from the dental surgery. I felt warm, safe, cradled in the anathesia's loving embrace. The pharmacy downstairs gave me a bottle of Vicodin and a few instructions: take it with food, don't mix with alcohol, don't operate heavy machinery. I put it in my pocket and we left. "Do you want to go home, or do you want to go to a bar?" asked Johnnie. (More...)
The Deep Dark Underbelly of the Star Wars Myth, or Ramayana Remembered
It's a fact: Star Wars is a blatant plagiarism of an ancient Asian legend, and the long lines of devout Star Wars freaks are really unscrupulous Asian copyright busters. From Indonesia to Thailand to Nepal, videos are available for sale or rent before they're even released in the US and UK due to this nerdy camcorder-clutching bunch. (More...)
The Peppermill Is Not Good For You
Paradise lounge on the strip. Expense it, bad boy! (More...)
During a magnificent sunny day in a fast receding autumn, the Spock Science Monitor reporters once again blew the playa dust off of their computers and covered the 2002 Burning Man Decompression – held every year just east of Portola Hill in beautiful San Francisco. Both an afternoon and evening issues were released to the unsuspecting crowd of freaks attempting to in some small way experience the euphoria of the playa – if but for a brief afternoon far from the desolation of Northern Nevada. (More...)
It's not like I have a heroin problem, see. I'm just a self-indulgent brat who likes to live beyond her means. When I zip down to my corner Money Mart for a little cash-till-payday loan, I'm really not planning to spend it on drugs. I'll spend it on sushi. Seventy bucks of interest for a two-week $400 loan is perfectly reasonable, if you really need that hamachi. (More...)
Experimenter is a film released in 2015 starring Peter Sarsgaard. It tells the story of Dr. Stanley Milgram's life, including the infamous Milgram electric shock experiment, tests on crowds, and his work developing a theory on the mechanics of social networks. It currently streams on Netflix. (More...)