Build Date: Thu Mar 27 11:50:22 2025 UTC
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
-- Dean Martin
Thom 'Starky' Stark
Thom 'Starky' Stark began life as a small child. Upon reaching the age of 15, he moved to San Francisco where he began a career as a street mime. Finding it difficult to remain silent for many hours at a time put a damper on his chosen profession, so he moved across the Bay to El Cerrito where he eventually ran for City Council. A scandal reputedly involving the mayor's wife, an unneutered pit pull terrier, and a box of chalupas caused Thom to flee town and hide out in the Sierra Nevada mountains.
There he sat at a computer terminal for as many as two hours a day, banging out copy for Boardwatch, IBM developerworks, and other technical journals. After the dot com crash the loss of ad revenue caused many of these publications to lay off columnists, leaving Thom to fall back on his skills as a mime to make ends meet.
Thom now lives in a hidden, double-wide fortress high in the Sierra Nevada mountains with a mysterious woman. There he works on a biography on the life of Alexander the Great, plays guitar and engages in experiments to breed the most docile pit bull terriers known to man.
Pigdog Journal Articles
2022-08-01
By now, you've undoubtedly learned of the death yesterday of Grace Dell Nichols - although you probably know her by her stage name, Nichelle Nichols - at the age of 89. Her son announced that she died of "natural causes," which is true of any decedent who isn't a victim of violence, infection, or accident, but she was institutionalized in 2019 because of dementia, and so the specific "natural cause" of her passing is, at present, undefined.
2018-03-02
If you follow music industry news, or even just general business news, you're probably aware that Gibson Brands, Inc. is teetering on the edge of bankruptcy. There's every reason to believe it will fall over that edge by August of this year at the very latest, because it has, as Bruce Springsteen put it in at least two different songs, "debts no honest man can pay."
2012-02-27
I want to strongly urge all U.S. pigdoggies who are currently registered as Democrats (and who live in states that don't enjoy open primaries) to do as I have done and re-register as Republicans, for the specific purpose of voting for Rick Santorum in the upcoming primaries.
2011-03-11
Running your mouth without engaging the clutch to your brain may result in laughter and finger-pointing ...
2005-04-04
...to tell that the Pope is dead.
2004-12-10
Once upon a time, a director set out to make a movie about Alexander the Great. He cast an up-and-coming young actor as the famous conqueror and surrounded him with a cast that included a superstar as his father Philip, an ingenue in her first real role as his love interest, and a host of major and minor stars and unknowns in supporting roles.
2003-02-03
I have been in love with manned spaceflight since I discovered the Tom Swift, Jr. books at the age of six.
When I was eight years old, Yuri Gagarin became the first human to leave the Earth, journey through space and return alive to tell the tale. And I danced for joy at the news, although it was the height of the Cold War and Gagarin was a Soviet citizen, because we -- the human race -- had finally, finally set out on the greatest adventure of this or any age.
2000-02-04
Thom Stark gives a tribute to Art Hoppe, longtime San Francisco columnist and Professional Journalist in every regard.
1999-07-13
Internet watchdog Thom Stark explains why Al Gore HAD TO INVENT THE INTERNET to protect you and me from the secret net cabal known as the "Graybeards." Along the way Stark demystifies their incantations and mystical code words -- ISOC, IETF, NSI, NGO, and many more.
1999-04-23
Think your local newspaper, the evening news and your Great Aunt Martha have hyperventilated over the Millenium Bug? Then you don't know about "Dr." Gary North, the King God Huckster of Y2K.
1998-12-28
This week: Thom 'Starky' Stark thinks about impeachment.
Offsite links shared by the author
2003-01-11
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Still Up For the Party? America's Dance Floors Are Graying
Raving over 30 doesn't have to be embarassing anymore. (More...)
Pigdog Journal's crack interview team gangs up on avant-garde Dutch musician SOLEX; bad craziness ensues. Yet another fabulous PIGDOG INTERVIEW. For REAL. (More...)
Clowns Take on God in Mysterious Annual Ceremony
Last Sunday's (the 6th) Grimaldi Service at a small church in East London was a red-letter day for clowns worldwide. About a hundred old-school red-nosed clowns made the sombre trip to darkest Dalston to pay their respects to clowns who died in the last year and to thank God for the gift of laughter in a bizarre ceremony presided over by the eccentric Reverend Clown Roly, resplendent in a garish red lumberjack shirt with oversized gold lapels. (More...)
We here in SMRL's Beverage Research Lab realize that there is more to life than just drinking spocktails. It's important to have other activities. One such activity that we wholeheartedly support is dancing six or more hours to Trance music. So we have designed a drink to accommodate this. (More...)
Paranoid Strippers & Psychotic Crack Dealers (Tales of Christmas Eve)
Christmas day, for the last 17 or so years has bored me. I find that the real fun and excitement always takes place on Christmas Eve. Every other year, it's the excitement of the metaphorical hunt instead of the kill. Otherwise, it's just plain bad craziness. (More...)
You need to make a fruity tropical drink and you have no recipe? Here's a mix recently tested by Pigdog's crack bevertology team that's made with ingredients available from most any grocery store. It tastes sweet, fruity, and is perfect for guzzling on the last hot days of summer. (More...)
