Build Date: Fri Nov 22 09:30:07 2024 UTC
Hot Girl-Girl Action keeps me sober one day at a time.
-- The Compulsive Splicer
Calm Before the Storm
1999-12-24 14:16:57
Well, T'is the Day Before Christmas, and it's probably a good thing that you're dicking around on the Web rather than stressing over last-minute XMas shopping like I am. Enjoy it while you can, because next week is going to SUCK.
After tomorrow, the Great Unwashed will FINALLY start concentrating en masse about Y2K. There's only 7 days left, after all, which is just on the horizon of America's attention span. And, HELL, the nightly news isn't going to be talking about anything else for a while.
Despite the fact that the media's emphasis for "last-minute plans" for Y2K is on finding a good party or restaurant to welcome the new year, I suspect that a lot more people will start listening to that queasy feeling in their bellies instead and go on a survival-buying spree. Water, dry food, gasoline, generators, cooking fuel, etc. will probably be harder to find next week than they will in Feb 2000. I bet a lot of people who normally wouldn't care are going to get irate about 5-day waiting periods for guns and bans on sales of ammo around New Year's. You can't get armed before Y2K, folks. Just in case you were wondering.
I've had plans for about 18 months to write an article entitled "Panic Now and Beat the Rush -- A Procrastinator's Guide to Y2K." Well, it's too late for that. Panic now and JOIN the rush is more like it. Those folks who've got any brains in their heads are all huddling in mountain cabins listening to their hand-cranked shortwaves and smugly Reading the Signs. The rest of us have got to deal with the shitstorm, I guess. Ugh! See you at the riots, eh?
T O P S T O R I E S
Another Nobel Prize-Winning Author Describes Drunkenness
This book won a Pulitzer Prize. Here's its famous paragraph on getting drunk... (More...)
'Why I'm pretty sure JD Vance had sex with a couch'
True or false? The answers await us in that magical land where all truths are revealed -- the internet. (More...)
In 2010 Dr. Cheng-Huai Ruan discovered a way to cause a patient with an abnormal heartbeat to get back into a normal rhythm by sticking a finger up the patient's ass. (More...)
WKRP in Cincinnati aired from 1978 through 1982. Howard Hesseman played Dr. Johnny Fever, a DJ from Los Angeles who was fired from his previous job for saying the word "booger" on the air. In the show Hesseman would do some dialogue, introduce a song, and start the song. You'd hear a few notes, but never the whole song. (More...)
SF Hippies Can't Get Their Act Together
The annual 420 Hippie Hill event in Golden Gate Park, where large crowds of hippies, wannabe hippies, and hippie poseurs drape themselves in tie dye t-shirts and gather on a hill on 4/20 to smoke weed, was cancelled this year because the organizers couldn't get their act together. (More...)
Mozart to be inducted into the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame
Joining such hard-rocking inductees as Abba, Chet Atkins, Nat King Cole, and Neil Diamond, the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame is proud to induct Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
This week: another fine spocktail from the beverage researchers at SMRL! Drink it in peace, because WE DID THE RESEARCH! (More...)
A Blast from the Past! Pao Tzu goes over and under the crucial variables in the production and consumption of Salvia Divinorum. A must read for psychonauts of all stripes. (More...)
An innocent trip to the Central Market resulted in a severe attack of arachnophobia (and a meal) when a depraved street kid set her vicious pet spider on an unsuspecting shopper. (More...)
It was the night of the Leonid meteor showers -- the perfect opportunity to break out the evil opaline liquor, get madder than hatters, and test wireless ethernet hardware... Would the plunging meteorites interfere with the 2.4GHz band? What about our delicate brain waves? (More...)
From the mixed up files of citizen 566-77-0776 (More...)
Boo-zho-lay for you, Pigdog reader! Another fine Spocktail of the week is available for you. And this week's offering is EXTRA special and fancy, since it celebrates the birthday of Pigdog's own STAR TWINS! (More...)
