Build Date: Tue Jun 30 15:10:10 2026 UTC
You can't drink in parks around here; so I don't even know how to get to the parks. They might be nice, but I'll never know.
-- S. Dallas, Esq.
SPOCK-2-K
1999-12-15 13:10:10
I think that if I've got to see the ENTIRE WORLD COLLAPSE this holiday season what with Y2K and all, I want to do it SPOCK-STYLE! And now the man himself has a BOOK to EXPLAIN HOW!
Chiggity-Check it out! Big SPOCK has a crazy BOOK and WEB SITE about surviving the DESTRUCTION of EARTH CULTURE come 1/1/2000. His new book, "Y2K Family Survival Guide" is a MUST-BUY for fans for civilization, families, and of course SPOCKO!
I don't have this book yet, but I'm sure it has lots of cool explanations of how to panic wildly, foam at the mouth, roll your eyes and bring Western culture to a screeching halt. Hopefully there's also good diagrams of how to make a crazy space ship to fly out of Earth and into a GOOD PLANET where there ain't no WHY TWO KAY!
I'm not exactly sure if I understand WHY Spock wrote this book, though. Why doesn't he just go back in time to the Sixties and tell the computer programmer guys at IBM with the big slide rules that they should not be dumb about Y2K? It would be real easy, so I don't understand! Perhaps is Edith Kieler involved?
Anyways, if everything goes to fuck-all, I'm going to go to Hollywood and camp on SPOCK'S FRONT LAWN. He's REAL SMART and he'll know exactly what to do! Beaujolais! Y2K! Spock got GAME!
T O P S T O R I E S
America's National Recording Registry Inducts Culturally Significant Artist - Weezer!
America's Library of Congress calls them "defining sounds of history and culture" and "audio treasures worthy of preservation for all time based on their cultural, historical or aesthetic importance in the nation’s recorded sound heritage." Ladies and gentlemen, I give you... Weezer! (More...)
The Crossroads are real and The Blues is a place; The enduring myth of Robert Johnson (More...)
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
It’s election night. My wife and I are holed-up in this hotel that my political party has rented out for the evening. Outside, people are being violently beaten for whom they voted for. Is this South Africa? Perhaps we’re in Haiti or some Southern state during the 60’s. Of all the places where this sort of thing happens, it’s mind-boggling that we are in Portland, Maine. (More...)
Skunk School -- Learn Why Not To Keep Skunks As Pets
There is an alarming trend in pet purchasing habits this fall. People inspired by the WWII film, "Life is Beautiful" -- the one with that annoying Italian guy -- are buying descented skunks by the millions. (More...)
It was Friday night at the Casa de Baron and everything was in place -- a group of friends had assembled, people were setting things on fire in the backyard, and a Ferry Corsten double-live CD was playing on the stereo. Everything was in place to make further scientific advances in beverage research and leisure technology. (More...)
Songs Of Love And Special Things
Well, dear reader, there's no denying it: Spring has sprung. The air is pungent with the fertile aroma of Romance. And you know what goes with Romance, don't you? That's right, Lover, porn. And not just any porn, but the kind you can sing along to. (More...)
Paranoid Strippers & Psychotic Crack Dealers (Tales of Christmas Eve)
Christmas day, for the last 17 or so years has bored me. I find that the real fun and excitement always takes place on Christmas Eve. Every other year, it's the excitement of the metaphorical hunt instead of the kill. Otherwise, it's just plain bad craziness. (More...)
Datelined "Historic Mariposa," the fateful press release came in like an angry wind, announcing the release of a self-produced album, "Ordinary Hero," by occasional Pigdog contributor Thom Stark, in the language and tone of a Major Event, setting off a brief firestorm around the pigdog mailing list. (More...)
