Build Date: Tue Oct 29 14:10:12 2024 UTC
My mommy was busy selling pez to gutterpunks on University Way trying to convince them it was crack.
-- Gank
Oh Hey... LOOK, We Have Comments
2011-03-18 21:12:01
Wow... we have comments... I mean the PDJ now allows you, our shithead readers to leave us comments.
I know this isn't a big deal to the rest of the web since like 2001, but the thing you have to understand is that the PDJ finished it's core development phase in 1998 and back then comments were new fangled things we didn't see the need for. We've always been old skool (or so far ahead of the pack it looks like old skool because you can't figure out what in the hell we are doing), so we kinda of missed that market jump. Sorry.
And see, it's not really our fault as things worked so well we just stopped developing the PDJ cause is worked and ... and also we got drunk (that happens a lot around here). Then... at some point, we stopped writing for the PDJ, which kinda sunk our all important unique visitors per month stat... which started a vicious feedback loop as why write when people aren't reading... but people won't visit a site without new content... so it's really a good thing we didn't give a crap. Oh wait, that was actually part of the problem.
Still, all things considered, we (well, mostly Mr Bad) wrote some damn good code. So hey, we're back online and kinda still of giving a shit... well, I am... and so is the Baron.... well sort of. As for the rest of the PDJ fuckers ... they are still passed out back in the PDJ writers lounge and nuclear bunker. Losers.
But you know, we dusted off our code and guess what... it's still is good... fucking good. Now I know most of you bloggers out there are all like... "YOU CODED YOUR OWN SITE??? UNPOSSIBLE!!!"
Thing is kids, back in 1998, there just weren't hundred thousand sites you just create your own blog barf bucket to spew your opinions all over the the web. Sites like EDumb and Facecrap didn't exist... so guess what, we wrote our own!!! Weird, huh? And that makes us better then you, cause we just went and created our own web site from scratch.
And so look at this, it still works. And honestly, after 12 years, I only remember one software bug that took us offline , the dreaded Billennium Bug. Yikes. That's like better then everyone. So admittedly, we've had hardware problems and but truth be told 99.99999999% of our offline time can be chalked up to hardware issues and general lack of "giving a shit".
But the Code. Fuck, it still works. And I remind you, this is 1998 vintage code... which in like 1,993,843 years old in internet years.
Which is fucking awesome.
However my point here is we just added comments. Yes it's a little late... but don't we fucking rock???? I mean for people from 1998?
So tell us what you think... ummm... finally.
T O P S T O R I E S
Another Nobel Prize-Winning Author Describes Drunkenness
This book won a Pulitzer Prize. Here's its famous paragraph on getting drunk... (More...)
'Why I'm pretty sure JD Vance had sex with a couch'
True or false? The answers await us in that magical land where all truths are revealed -- the internet. (More...)
In 2010 Dr. Cheng-Huai Ruan discovered a way to cause a patient with an abnormal heartbeat to get back into a normal rhythm by sticking a finger up the patient's ass. (More...)
WKRP in Cincinnati aired from 1978 through 1982. Howard Hesseman played Dr. Johnny Fever, a DJ from Los Angeles who was fired from his previous job for saying the word "booger" on the air. In the show Hesseman would do some dialogue, introduce a song, and start the song. You'd hear a few notes, but never the whole song. (More...)
SF Hippies Can't Get Their Act Together
The annual 420 Hippie Hill event in Golden Gate Park, where large crowds of hippies, wannabe hippies, and hippie poseurs drape themselves in tie dye t-shirts and gather on a hill on 4/20 to smoke weed, was cancelled this year because the organizers couldn't get their act together. (More...)
Mozart to be inducted into the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame
Joining such hard-rocking inductees as Abba, Chet Atkins, Nat King Cole, and Neil Diamond, the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame is proud to induct Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
The end of summer is near and sirens call of Black Rock City are beginning to summons Pigdoggers from all of the world to Burning Man. Spock Mountain Research Labs (SMRL), the world leader in beverage science and leisure technology will be at our second home for a week at 5:00 and Infant (how fitting) as we enjoy the liberated lifestyle of a temporary community 200 miles from nowhere... (More...)
Things to Say When You're Losing a Technical Argument
Mr. Bad and Crackmonkey collaborate on a fine Mr. Bad's List. We put together ALL the TECHNOLOGY you ever need to know in order to STUMP your OPPONENT in a technical argument. Use these only when your back is against the wall -- they're definitely desperation tactics. (More...)
A Day in the Life of a Beverotologist
It was starting to look like a very boring Saturday, trapped as I was in the suburban wastelands of the outer Bay Area, so I called my Able Assistant (AA) and proposed that we perform some Spocktail field tests. For some time I've been working on creating the quintessential cinematic beverage and even tho' SMRL does most of its testing during nocturnal hours, this seemed an opportune time to roll up the sleeves of our labcoats and get some science done. While the beverotology creation tested this day (The Neurotoxin) must be deemed a success, this article focuses more the journey of the experimenters, rather then the science of beverotology. (More...)
Pigdog dispatched special correspondent Ratsnatcher for a holiday reconnaissance of America's frozen hell. After ten days of silence, our shortwave radio cackled with Ratsnatcher's static-filled transmission. (More...)
Our team of crack journalists went insane, and made the drive from Concord, California to Concord, New Hasmpshire on Interstate 80. Read the insightful observations of our intrepid travelers made on their journey into the heartland. (More...)
About 14 years ago when I was on a road trip and stopped in Seattle, I was invited to a party. At this party there were these little tiny glasses sitting in a flat-bottomed bowl of ice. Thin cylinders about an inch in diameter and 4 inches tall, with thick glass at the bottom. Into these were poured frozen AKVAVIT... also known as the water of life. (More...)