Build Date: Fri Mar 14 05:40:16 2025 UTC
I realized at some point that I would have to give up either drinking or driving. It was a very easy decision to make. The next day somebody offered me 1000 dollars for my car. I spent it on food and drinks.
-- Ocha Ha
This is NOT Jenni
1999-11-11 10:26:22
Like everyone else on the planet, I've looked at The Jenni show web site, and have been bored silly by it. She doesn't do anything I can relate to. Oh, look at Jenni read a book! Look she's naked and appears to be masturbating. Big whoop. I want to see things I can relate to. Finally, there's a web site featuring things I can
Not Jenni's web site is chock full of things I can relate to on a daily basis. Shooting up, cannibalism, slipping your friends powerful hallucinogens. You know everyday stuff. If Jenni is going to expect Pigdog to give her money, she had better be prepared to top Not Jenni.
And a personal message to Not Jenni- next time, removes the belt after injection. You'll find the rush a lot better.
T O P S T O R I E S
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
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The Once & Future King of Dust
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Another Nobel Prize-Winning Author Describes Drunkenness
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Why I'm pretty sure JD Vance had sex with a couch
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In 2010 Dr. Cheng-Huai Ruan discovered a way to cause a patient with an abnormal heartbeat to get back into a normal rhythm by sticking a finger up the patient's ass. (More...)
WKRP in Cincinnati aired from 1978 through 1982. Howard Hesseman played Dr. Johnny Fever, a DJ from Los Angeles who was fired from his previous job for saying the word "booger" on the air. In the show Hesseman would do some dialogue, introduce a song, and start the song. You'd hear a few notes, but never the whole song. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
The IBM Selectric Typewriter Changed My Life
I ran my hands lovingly across her frame, lightly brushing her metallic nipples with my fingers, admiring the shapes and the ways of her curves, the empathetic hum she produced as I had my way with her, the way she made it all seem so effortless and right... she didn't even seem to mind the way I roughly manipulated her knobs and tweaked her casing. She was extremely tolerant, for a typewriter. (More...)
Pigdog brings you SETI astronomer Seth Shostak to bring you the truth about Ay-leens (More...)
Poor Metallica. All they want is to continue to put out the same weak "Heavy Metal" they've been churning out since the "And Justice For All" days? and make gooey wads of cash in the process. The problem is, people aren't buying their bound for the heavy metal scrap heap, over-produced, uninspired, tired crap. And let's face it, their various commercial endorsements won't pay for the lifestyle they've become comfortably accustomed to. Resorting to lawsuits makes perfect sense, when you need spending money. But just one lawsuit isn't going to pay their bills. So, to aid Metallica, I've composed an open letter to the boys in the band, with suggestions as to whom else they might sic their lapdog lawyers on... (More...)
All this talk about death, wakes and Moloch recently has, frankly, got me a little worried. What if I'm next to go? I could slip on a wet banana peel and slam my head against an enormous brass statue at almost any time. I'm not planning well enough for this sort of thing. Who will talk for me when this terrible day comes? (More...)
When you've been up all night sampling other Spocktails and guzzling absinthe, you need a morning pick-me-up with some KICK. Time for a tall glass of Blurry Sharp Meltdown! (More...)
The Innocent San Francisco Mule
Flesh and Abby have moved to an isolated rural location in the United States - equipped only with their sense of adventure. Recently they came down off the mountain briefly to file this report? (More...)
