Build Date: Wed Feb 5 09:40:10 2025 UTC
Don't tell me how to do my research! I'll prattle all I want.
-- Bonehead
Officer Friendly Howls in Frustration
1999-10-23 14:20:00
I make no bones about it: I hate cops. In my entire life, I've only met two cops that I consider to be shinning examples of being a peace officer. The rest I consider to be nothing more than uniformed thugs with guns. They exist within their own social circle with little to no contact with anyone who isn't a cop. They behave as if anyone who isn't a cop is considered a subhuman form of life to be looked down upon and herded like sick cattle. I'm certainly not the only person that feels this way about cops.
We have on record example after example of cops grossly abusing their positions of power. And unfortunately, the chances of you being on the business end of this abuse are becoming greater every day. Especially if you happen to be a non-Caucasian, male driver. No one in this country knows this better than the American Civil Liberties Union.
The ACLU, contrary to what AM radio blowhards would like you to believe, is a non-partisan organization devoted to the defense of Constitutional & Civil Rights. They have defended everyone from The Black Panthers to Oliver North. Recently, the ACLU placed on their web site a document that will have bad cops all over the United States punching the brick walls of the local donut shops in frustration.
In light of so many people being popped for "Driving While Black," the ACLU has created the "Bust Card." A set of instructions on what you should do if you a cop stops you, shows up on your doorstep, or arrests you. This is a must-have for anyone living in the U.S.
Some of the information contained on the "Bust Card" is common sense, such as keeping your wits about you and your temper in check when confronted with an arrest situation; and some is legal technicalities that not every citizen may be aware of, but would be in their best interest to memorize, in the event that a "worst case scenario" should arise. I admit, this probably won't make the cops treat you any better than everyone else. But it's good advice and a step in the right direction… and hopefully will make them think twice.
T O P S T O R I E S
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
The Once & Future King of Dust
Only The Onion could have acquired Infowarts. (More...)
Another Nobel Prize-Winning Author Describes Drunkenness
This book won a Pulitzer Prize. Here's its famous paragraph on getting drunk... (More...)
Why I'm pretty sure JD Vance had sex with a couch
True or false? The answers await us in that magical land where all truths are revealed -- the internet. (More...)
In 2010 Dr. Cheng-Huai Ruan discovered a way to cause a patient with an abnormal heartbeat to get back into a normal rhythm by sticking a finger up the patient's ass. (More...)
WKRP in Cincinnati aired from 1978 through 1982. Howard Hesseman played Dr. Johnny Fever, a DJ from Los Angeles who was fired from his previous job for saying the word "booger" on the air. In the show Hesseman would do some dialogue, introduce a song, and start the song. You'd hear a few notes, but never the whole song. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Hooray! At long last, a NEW Spocktail of the Week! Kid-tested, mother-approved! (More...)
What do Computers and Skateboards have in Common?
They both sprang from the mind of John Mauchly that's what. (More...)
All this talk about death, wakes and Moloch recently has, frankly, got me a little worried. What if I'm next to go? I could slip on a wet banana peel and slam my head against an enormous brass statue at almost any time. I'm not planning well enough for this sort of thing. Who will talk for me when this terrible day comes? (More...)
Yet another delicious SPOCKTAIL from the SMRL Beverage Science Labs! Check under the cap for your chance to win thousands of fabulous prizes! (More...)
It was Friday night at the Casa de Baron and everything was in place -- a group of friends had assembled, people were setting things on fire in the backyard, and a Ferry Corsten double-live CD was playing on the stereo. Everything was in place to make further scientific advances in beverage research and leisure technology. (More...)
Patient Joab's scientifick editorial discusses aspect of the space-time-beer continuum never before processed by sub-bush-robot minds!!! Too fabulantastic to contempulate! (More...)