Build Date: Thu Nov 21 15:40:07 2024 UTC

Fuck this town. Fuck the internet. Fuck it all...
-- Manny

I Represent All of Christendom

by Mr. Bad

1999-12-14 19:53:08

FINALLY! The Catholic Church has recognized my leadership in the ecumenical world by granting me license to represent them on-line! My fabulous new catholic.org email address proves it!

It's surpisingly EASY to get a catholic.org email address. I would normally not deserve one, considering that I have practically zero experience with Catholicism. My closest tie is my abnormal fascination with the machinations of the world-controlling Society of Jesus and its shadowy army of black-robed ninjas, so maybe that's why they threw this accolade my way. I am more than a little proud that mister_bad@catholic.org has such a euphonious ring to it.

Are you up for the challenge? If you pass the goats-vs.-sheep, wheat-vs.-chaff test of the coolio registration Web form that they have on the site, YOU TOO could be qualified to represent the Catholic Church in worldly matters! Become a power-broker for the world's largest non-governmental organization! Wear pointy hats and remarkably complex and inscrutable vestments! Speak authoritatively on transubstantiation and Albigensianism! Issue your own papal bulls! Persecute heretics on- and off-line! Excommunicate your enemies at WILL!

Rock on! Catholic dot org! Check it out!

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

szithead@pigdog.org

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