Build Date: Sat Nov 23 23:10:10 2024 UTC
What do you drink, those little things called "pints"?
-- Master Squid
Esperanto for Bad Swingers of the Future
2000-11-01 12:09:06
But of course! Esperanto is useful for so many purposes, it's time to use it for picking up fraulinoj, my friend.
As is often pointed out, Esperanto is the language of the future for Bad People everywhere. The more diabolical among you have already taken steps towards mastering this great language. Some of you have not been so quick on the uptake. Perhaps it's because of the lack of immediately useful phrases. Sure, you can ask for the nearest toilet in an Esperantejo with Travlang, but what about the useful stuff? Look no further, friends.
How to speak Esperanto like a restless native will give you a good foundation for your future learning, and more importantly your confidence. No longer will you have to fumble around with your English to Esperanto dictionary when you're talking to a belulinoj (attractive woman). By memorising just a few key phrases like "Mi estas festema ulo." and "Mi ne plu estas infektita.", your dream esperantist date will be putty in your hands.
For the odd Klingon or Finn you run into, this site has just as useful phrase pages.
T O P S T O R I E S
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In 2010 Dr. Cheng-Huai Ruan discovered a way to cause a patient with an abnormal heartbeat to get back into a normal rhythm by sticking a finger up the patient's ass. (More...)
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SF Hippies Can't Get Their Act Together
The annual 420 Hippie Hill event in Golden Gate Park, where large crowds of hippies, wannabe hippies, and hippie poseurs drape themselves in tie dye t-shirts and gather on a hill on 4/20 to smoke weed, was cancelled this year because the organizers couldn't get their act together. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Johnnie Royale's Guide to Wakes
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The One I Feel Sorry For Is Joses
We've had a lot of Jesus coverage lately here at the PDJ. But let's face it, we're not exactly cutting-edge in this subject area. Jesus has been making headlines for, oh, I guess it's a couple thousand years now. Jesus is a very strong brand. Jesus has a lot of mindshare. (More...)
Juggler Vain attempts to wrestle with the issues around the KPFA shutdown; Big-time wrestling ensues. (More...)
A Day in the Life of a Beverotologist
It was starting to look like a very boring Saturday, trapped as I was in the suburban wastelands of the outer Bay Area, so I called my Able Assistant (AA) and proposed that we perform some Spocktail field tests. For some time I've been working on creating the quintessential cinematic beverage and even tho' SMRL does most of its testing during nocturnal hours, this seemed an opportune time to roll up the sleeves of our labcoats and get some science done. While the beverotology creation tested this day (The Neurotoxin) must be deemed a success, this article focuses more the journey of the experimenters, rather then the science of beverotology. (More...)
We here in SMRL's Beverage Research Lab realize that there is more to life than just drinking spocktails. It's important to have other activities. One such activity that we wholeheartedly support is dancing six or more hours to Trance music. So we have designed a drink to accommodate this. (More...)
It's not like I have a heroin problem, see. I'm just a self-indulgent brat who likes to live beyond her means. When I zip down to my corner Money Mart for a little cash-till-payday loan, I'm really not planning to spend it on drugs. I'll spend it on sushi. Seventy bucks of interest for a two-week $400 loan is perfectly reasonable, if you really need that hamachi. (More...)
