Build Date: Thu Jan 30 05:20:31 2025 UTC
I'm really pissed at NASA.... I'm also really drunk.
-- Johnnie Royale
Javertising!
2000-01-23 16:46:57
It's ADVERTISING! Using JAVUR! How cool is that!?! They even call it JAVERTISING, which I have to say is the coolio name of the century.
OK, I'll admit it -- I'm not a big fan of advertising. Actually, I pretty much hate it. BUT, and here's the big but, BUT, I love to call "Java" "Javur"! It's great! It makes it sound like the world's greates hillbilly program language. "Fix me up some of that thar JAVUR and I'll build this chicken coop with XML." "I hooked up some server-side JAVUR to the still DATURBASE and I think it improved the flavor of the HyperWhiskey a mite."
I love Javur! No other programming languages, except I guess Modulur-2 or maybe Adur, have the same great -UR ending. So when I found out about JAVERTISING, I knew it was gonna be great. JAVER! Right there in the name. Even though it ended with gross "tising". But what can you do, right?
Actually, this Javertising site isn't all that bad. All I can tell is that they do weird client-side XML stuff, which, like, whatever. I don't know what the fuck that has to do with JAVERTISING, but nobody ever called me a Web entrepreneur, so maybe there's just an enzyme I'm missing that would make this all make sense.
Javertising!
T O P S T O R I E S
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The Once & Future King of Dust
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Another Nobel Prize-Winning Author Describes Drunkenness
This book won a Pulitzer Prize. Here's its famous paragraph on getting drunk... (More...)
Why I'm pretty sure JD Vance had sex with a couch
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In 2010 Dr. Cheng-Huai Ruan discovered a way to cause a patient with an abnormal heartbeat to get back into a normal rhythm by sticking a finger up the patient's ass. (More...)
WKRP in Cincinnati aired from 1978 through 1982. Howard Hesseman played Dr. Johnny Fever, a DJ from Los Angeles who was fired from his previous job for saying the word "booger" on the air. In the show Hesseman would do some dialogue, introduce a song, and start the song. You'd hear a few notes, but never the whole song. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
The end of summer is near and sirens call of Black Rock City are beginning to summons Pigdoggers from all of the world to Burning Man. Spock Mountain Research Labs (SMRL), the world leader in beverage science and leisure technology will be at our second home for a week at 5:00 and Infant (how fitting) as we enjoy the liberated lifestyle of a temporary community 200 miles from nowhere... (More...)
What the hell is going on with Sony?
Is anyone else as confused as I am with what's happening with the Sony Playstation network hack? (More...)
During a magnificent sunny day in a fast receding autumn, the Spock Science Monitor reporters once again blew the playa dust off of their computers and covered the 2002 Burning Man Decompression – held every year just east of Portola Hill in beautiful San Francisco. Both an afternoon and evening issues were released to the unsuspecting crowd of freaks attempting to in some small way experience the euphoria of the playa – if but for a brief afternoon far from the desolation of Northern Nevada. (More...)
A Day in the Life of a Beverotologist
It was starting to look like a very boring Saturday, trapped as I was in the suburban wastelands of the outer Bay Area, so I called my Able Assistant (AA) and proposed that we perform some Spocktail field tests. For some time I've been working on creating the quintessential cinematic beverage and even tho' SMRL does most of its testing during nocturnal hours, this seemed an opportune time to roll up the sleeves of our labcoats and get some science done. While the beverotology creation tested this day (The Neurotoxin) must be deemed a success, this article focuses more the journey of the experimenters, rather then the science of beverotology. (More...)
A Nobel Prize-Winning Author Describes Liquor
Curled up cozy with a good book? All warm and snuggly and thinking about friends far away? So am I, reading the greatest story by the greatest writer -- when he suddenly starts waxing philosophical about liquor! (More...)
Datelined "Historic Mariposa," the fateful press release came in like an angry wind, announcing the release of a self-produced album, "Ordinary Hero," by occasional Pigdog contributor Thom Stark, in the language and tone of a Major Event, setting off a brief firestorm around the pigdog mailing list. (More...)
