Build Date: Sat Apr 18 21:40:36 2026 UTC
Once you accept the Bozo that is within yourself, you can accept the Bozo that is within us ALL. And they all had the best Christmas ever.
-- Tjames Madison
Steal Ben Stein's Money!
2000-01-13 15:53:49
Jeeze, a lot of people these days are real selfish with their money. But not Ben Stein. Almost everyday he goes on TV and gives everyday people just like you and me a chance to take home some of his money. That's why it makes me so mad when some people aren't willing to play by the rules. They could have gone on Comedy Central and gotten a chance to get Ben Steins money fair and square. But noooooo, they had hold him up in his garage with a hand gun!
They took all his money and his watch and his briefcase. Ummm, people, the name of the game is not "Win Ben Stein's Personal Possessions!" I bet they really sucked at playing Trivial Pursuit as children. You know, I wouldn't be the least bit surprised if Ben Stein didn't want to give people an opportunity to win his money any more. I mean you give and give and give and people just want to take and take and take.
Too bad he won't be able to bring charges against the guys who did it. There's no way he could prove that he didn't want to give them that money-- not after everyone in the world watched him give it away on national television over and over again. Not to mention they fact that they didn't actually hurt him. Sure they accosted him in his own garage and waved a gun in his face, but he could have resisted if he wanted to.
And what did he expect? Walking around with $1,000 and his paycheck in his wallet! I just hope he's learned his lesson the little whore....
T O P S T O R I E S
The Crossroads are real and The Blues is a place; The enduring myth of Robert Johnson (More...)
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
It was New Year's Eve and I wanted a signature drink I could hand to my guests. Something that they would accept with no fuss, drink quickly, and then want another. A drink simple enough that I could explain the recipe quickly -- thereby annointing each new guest as a bartender capable of making the drink -- and freeing me to enjoy myself. So I created The MAN-tini... (More...)
High Availability Guinness Stress Test
All too often we forget the incredible depth of technology behind the weekly ritual of TNiPN@*. We tend to only become aware of the strategy of High Available Guinness (HAG) when it rises to the forefront during a complete and utter venue failure. Yet we should all be super grateful that this system exists. (More...)
It was Friday night at the Casa de Baron and everything was in place -- a group of friends had assembled, people were setting things on fire in the backyard, and a Ferry Corsten double-live CD was playing on the stereo. Everything was in place to make further scientific advances in beverage research and leisure technology. (More...)
This week: another fine spocktail from the beverage researchers at SMRL! Drink it in peace, because WE DID THE RESEARCH! (More...)
We here in SMRL's Beverage Research Lab realize that there is more to life than just drinking spocktails. It's important to have other activities. One such activity that we wholeheartedly support is dancing six or more hours to Trance music. So we have designed a drink to accommodate this. (More...)
It was the night of the Leonid meteor showers -- the perfect opportunity to break out the evil opaline liquor, get madder than hatters, and test wireless ethernet hardware... Would the plunging meteorites interfere with the 2.4GHz band? What about our delicate brain waves? (More...)
